Friday 21 November 2014

A must read…

Nothing to do with the house but it has everything to do with living our lives!

Can mums (and women in general) please know it's okay to be real! You are not alone…

The other day I stood in my closet and I just screamed.
It was a scream of frustration. Of feeling lost and unimportant. Of fighting, fighting, fighting and never feeling like I measured up. Of feeling overwhelmed. Of not wanting do one more thing and yet knowing that the to-do list had a dozen one more things to do. Of being tired of dealing with fighting over boys that decided today was the day to irritate every one of their brothers. Of my phone dinging.
Of me feeling alone.
I wasn’t going to write about it.
After all, I had just returned from Pittsburgh where I stood in front of a room of women, of moms, where I told them that they are enough and that they can do this and that I believe in them. And here I was.
Broken.
I wasn’t going to share that I got to that point in my day where I just had enough.
But we don’t talk about those days as moms.
Let me rephrase that – we don’t share about those days that much. We live in a world of edited disclosure of life. We live in a world where Pinterest tells us that there are 52 Easy Crock Pot Meals that we can make (insert guilt for the cold cereal we served last night) and 119 Cleaning Hacks Using Vinegar so That We Don’t Have to Use Chemicals (insert guilt for the Lysol below the sink) and 13 Reasons Why Motherhood is the Best (insert guilt for the times when it certainly doesn’t feel that way) and 44 Handmade Christmas Gifts for Kids (insert guilt because we don’t have time or money to do this but now we think we should).
We live with Facebook status updates with friends outside of DisneyWorld (insert guilt for never taking the kids to Disney World) with the words we are so blessed that make us sit there wondering why some are blessed and others are not.
We live with options options options options – so much that it can make our heads spin and hurt. And then, instead of loving who we are as moms, the options have this crazy superpower to allow us to question almost every decision because inevitably it’s not the right one and we become more frozen in fear and indecision than my kids toys which were left outside and are now frozen in piles of snow (insert guilt for not getting everything put away and following the 8 Easy Steps for Fall Cleanup Post that is out there).
There are articles endorsing this parenting method and another slamming it to pieces. There are those adamant about the evils of vaccines and those adamant about the evils of not vaccinating. There are worries about GMOS, plastics, artificial sweeteners, over scheduled kids, under scheduled kids, and influenza. There are pressures to have our kids in sports at three and speaking languages at four and attending science classes at five and being in advanced reading at six and being on the honor roll at seven and doing leadership training at eight and on and on. There are voices endorsing only breastfeeding and then those talking about bottle feeding and then those talking about co-parenting and then this type of labor method and this type of parenting style and this type of family and marriage and what is best and I could go on and on but I try to keep these posts to a certain number of words.
And then there is us.
The mom.
With a world of expectations that we must sift and wade through and decide if it’s really important even though the world and everyone is screaming at us that this is the only way even though none of the only ways ever match with another.
We make a decision and then come across 18 ways why it’s not the right thing.
So we doubt. We read. We try.
We feel like we don’t measure up. We buy the coffee from the neighbor kid for the fundraiser because we feel like we need to do that but then it makes our budget tighter and we didn’t feel like we could say no.
And sometimes, sometimes we just want to be loved and to feel like our contribution to this crazy thing called life is making a difference. And when we don’t or when the expectations press down on us like a ton of bricks and when we’re constantly feeling like we’re dropping the ball or when we’re simply simply simply tired we get to that point that I was at on Sunday night.
Overwhelmed.
I think that somehow we forget that we’re only human.
Somehow motherhood became this expectation of greatness and awesomeness and there are so many of us out there that are running so hard to just keep up that we’re out of breath and we don’t even have time to sit on the sidelines and catch our breath. And we don’t give ourselves grace to have those moments where we stumble and fall down and cry tears of exhausting and sadness and feel the emotion of life and not rationalize it with the logic of life that will tell us that we’ll be okay.
When I’m at that point I don’t want to be called supermom.
I just want to be told it’s okay.
It’s okay to feel overwhelmed sometimes. It’s okay to feel super frustrated at your kids. It’s okay to be angry that your life isn’t where you want it. It’s okay to feel worried about money. It’s okay to feel like you’re not getting everything done. It’s okay to feel. It’s okay to feel like you’re doing it all and you’re tired. It’s okay.
It’s okay to be real.
For real.
I think that’s the part that we don’t talk about too much.
I think social media allows us as women to like a status and to move on. It lets us pin things adding to a list of things that we never got done. It allows us to read quotes that are inspiring but doesn’t often allow us the space to feel.
Feeling isn’t a bad thing.
We weren’t designed to be without emotions and thus always perfect.
Because the truth is – I didn’t stay there. I had my moment of overwhelm. A bad day. Or just a bad hour. And then I moved on. Did the next thing. Put the boys to bed. Said I was sorry for being curt and crabby. Felt some guilt over not always being strong but then realized that there is not ever one Pinterest Pin out there that says 21 Ways Mothers Should Always Be Strong.
You know why?
Because deep down we all know that there are moments where we just need to be told you’ll be okay and that you will get through and that you matter. Motherhood is not ever ever ever about perfection.
It’s about starting again.
It’s about sifting through the barrage of social media expectations and knowing that even if you never ever ever did one more thing on any of those lists that you are still an awesome mom. It’s about looking at the mom next to you and loving her in her brokenness and encouraging her to keep going.
It’s about believing in each other and admitting that sometimes raising kids isn’t always sunshine, rainbows, and glitter.
It’s about not sitting in the weakness moments but having the courage and the bravery to try again.
Even if it means coming out of your room and gathering your boys together and looking them in the eyes and telling them I love you so much. So so so much. And I love being your mom even when I get tired. I know. Because I did that.
So dear mom reading this raw and real and vulnerable words of mine I want you to know two things. One, there is no expectation placed on you to be supermom. Just be you. Try your best. Love your kids. Give yourself grace. And see the amazing things that you do in life. Two, you will be okay. Your kids will be okay. And it’s okay to have days where you’re overwhelmed. It’s okay.
Because the bottom line is this -> You matter.
On the Good days. The bad days. The normal days.
That’s the real truth.
So gather your resolve. Look at yourself in the mirror and see you for not everywhere where you could list you didn’t think you measured up but rather start to see the truth.
You are strong. Powerful.
And human.

~Rachel

Tuesday 18 November 2014

another update

Here are a few pics of the garden for those asking :)


Some wonderful friends delivered most of our plants on Friday for us.
There were a few late nights involved to get them in.
Hubby decided to rip up the dead lawn without having enough new turf to lay. It meant an early trip to Bunnings and only just finished 5 mins before we were to renew our wedding vows in our new home. But it did look better for the day with a few beautiful friends.

 Eternity ring he picked for me

 and here are my curtains my lovely friend helped me make

Saturday 1 November 2014

book storage…

Just some of the hundreds of children's books we have.
I temporarily put them in cardboard boxes under number 3's bed.
I plan on building a timber shelf to get the same look…
Don't mind the world map, it's not finished and it's all out of proportion. I think when I can afford it I will get the world map wall mural to fit the space.


Friday 24 October 2014

finally… internet

Wow! it's been so long since I last posted, but we have been very busy moving, unpacking, painting, shelving, wallpapering, shopping, etc that I didn't really mind not having the internet connected. It forced me to get lots done…

So we are so so so loving our new home. It's lovely not to have to deal with real estate agents and land lords anymore. We can do what we like to our house :)

We haven't had many issues. Just small things to put on our three month fix list.

Things I have been up too…
I have been ripping out silly ventilated shelving in the pantry and installing timber shelves. Wallpapered a wall (my first, and last). Building flat packs, painting walls inside and outside, installing the plantation shutters. Heaps of stuff and heaps more to go…
  • Electrician to finish installing lights (after I seal the render). 
  • Hubby to do the gardens with the help of a wonderful friend. 
  • Replace some furniture that doesn't fit i.e. dining table. 
  • Make the curtains.
  • French pave the alfresco with silver travertine. 
  • Get outside timber gates installed and paint them white.
I haven't started the boys rooms… It will seriously be never ending while I still enjoy DIYing :)

Anyway, enough talk. Here are a few pics for those who have been asking :)

 kitchen

 living room  (curtains will go on the door)

 wall paper in entryway (don't mind little miss I have to be in every photo)

 Main bedroom shutters (sorry didn't bother fixing the bed)

I am really happy with the quality of the plantation shutters through iseek blinds.
I measured and installed all of the plantation shutters in the house. But… I made one stupid expensive mistake. I switched the main bathroom measurements around on the order form in a rush and so the shutters fitted perfectly (the wrong way). Now I have to wait till after Christmas for the shutters to be re made. The boys still have to wait for total privacy :(

The front is now painted and rendered.
Unfortunately most of our buffalo grass is dead. It's going on the list!

Ensuit

Okay, just one of Typography (the cat that is)

Tuesday 26 August 2014

Practical Completion Inspection (PCI)

This morning hubby and I has our PCI appointment with our Site Supervisor (SS).

Just like to say our splash back now looks soooo noise :)

The appliances are in and it's all looking sweet ;)

We are very excited it's all coming along so well. There are not too many things to fix up. Just some paint touch up's, few dents in the range-hood flue that will need replacing, a few floor boards are scratched and need replacing, timber to seal the sides of the front and back doors, some silicone sealing, front and back yard levelled better, and a few other bits and pieces but nothing too major.

We have been so happy with Mark our SS. It's nice to have someone who is both laid back yet onto everything you ask for, and happy to please. It certainly makes the building experience much more pleasant.

Our solicitors are still waiting on MJH solicitors to contact them regarding settlement. They sure are leaving it to the last minute, I really hope we are on track for getting our keys in two days time!

I didn't take any pics today as there was things on the bench from the painters etc. So it wasn't looking heaps pretty. I will take some nice shots when they handover the keys :)

Nearly there…




Saturday 9 August 2014

quick update

Here are a fews pics…

Well they have certainly decided to replace the splash back! ?
I wonder if this is up to standard with leaving the cupboards on and only replacing the gyprock around them?

 I changed some of the ugly handles with some nice black ones. I still need to do the draws with pull handles but need a drill for that job :)


Totally hate the scotia around all the kitchen cupboards and kick-boards. Not sure what I can do about it now :(

Sunday 3 August 2014

waiting…



Well I'm back after a long overdue update.

We were supposed to hear on the 1st August that our Occupation Certificate had been received, but that didn't happen.

After we get the certificate it should be another 2 weeks till handover.

Today we went to show a friend the outside assuming the house would be all locked up for the weekend but the back door was not locked so we were able to go in… YAY!

There are a few issues we noticed.

…WARNING Whinging!…

* Subway splash back tiles are two different shades of white, and the returns are not done.

* Gaps around doors, skirting, under sink.

* Doors sticking.

* A big concern for me is that where the grate is in our backyard, the yard is not level. It makes that corner of an already tidy yard unusable. I will certainly be wanting the retaining wall to continue up in that corner so our yard is flat just like everyone else's!

* The front yard was dug up to fix a blockage in the sewer line, but now the ground is uneven. I would also like the front yard levelled better!

* The two light battens either side of the garage door are too low. Don't know if they can raise them at this stage. But the lights we have chosen will look so stupid at that hight!

* Towel rail in main bathroom is too high.

* Letterbox needs changing to white.

* Fly-screens not on.

* Lots of paining to finish.

Thats about it for now with the whining ;)

Things that have been done are…

* Bamboo floor-boards that I LOVE! But I can already see how much dust/dirt they show up :0

* Carpets that I don't love :( they are heaps darker grey than I was expecting. But oh well.

* Side pavers and pebbles done. (Will need to seriously get rid of those pebbles because my boys will touch them ALL-THE-TIME)

* Clothes line in.

* French doors are looking AMAZABALLS with the windows in them cleaned :)

* Drive way is now sprayed. I imagined the texture to be heaps more rough but I'm pleasantly surprised it isn't. Also not 100% liking the colour but I think with the choice range we had to go from it was the best match to our house. We can't tell how well it will go until the render and painting is done, but at the moment the driveway is looking a bit too peachy :(

* Grass is down, but already looking half dead. I think in another 3 weeks it will look really dead :(

Think thats about all. I met one of our lovely neighbours :) and another one today. Praise God for lovely neighbours - YAY!

We also have had some fun purchasing some things for the home (between packing) such as the home theatre goodies, $$ curtain fabric, cushions, and other things. It's all getting a wee bit exciting :)

Here are some pics from today…

 the drain/yard issue

 the gap at door

See the two tile colours!!!

under kitchen sink gap

Main bathroom (towel rail too high)

our beautiful french doors :) 

Grey carpet in C's room 

Laundry 

looking down the hallway

looking up the hallway 

 dining/lounge room/kitchen area

same from another angle 

home theatre room/guest bedroom

clothes-line and small child

driveway colour 

outside lights too low :(

lights to go out the front
(black ones to go out the back)

side of house 

front yard not very level

 this is the door for the curtains

and these are the curtains I've ordered :)
This photo is from the very amazing house at The Sunny Side Up Blog.
One day I will get timber french alfresco doors ;)